James Hetfield is Dating Kim Kardashian
Metallica frontman James Hetfield and his wife of 25 years, Francesca, confirmed that they are indeed getting divorced. Now it is confirmed that James is dating Kim Kardashian. Kardashian is recently divorced and also just broke up with her boyfriend Pete Davidson.
The pair was spotted canoodling at the Four Seasons in Vail, Colorado. They were seen hiking, biking, golfing, fly fishing and getting cozy in the hot springs. During dinner, the Paparazzi caught the pair eating spaghetti and meatballs like Lady and the Tramp. “It was quite disgusting” said Lisa Adams. “I was trying to eat my dinner and I had to watch those two slurping and slobbering on each other. They were like animals. There were children in the restaurant. I asked to see the manager and expressed my displeasure. THat disgusting display put me right off my beet salad.”
The Perfect Man
Kim told Madhouse News that James checks all her boxes. “He is unstable with a history of addiction problems. Plus he has a neck tattoo. He is the perfect man in my book. I should actually write a book, I am really good at picking men.” Kim is thrice divorced and has left a trail of broken men in her wake.
Hetfield added, “Kim is my soul mate and she saved me. As Sir-Mix-A-Lot once said, I like big butts and I cannot lie. Being with Kim is like making love to a waterbed. I have to tie a broomstick to my back so I don’t get pulled in. The vortex is really strong once she gets going.“
Hetfield confirmed that he and Kim are working on new music together for the next Metallica album. “She has a lot of good ideas and she has an amazing voice” giggled Hetfield. “We already recorded a duet together of that song by James Taylor and Carly Simon. You know, mock yeah, ing yeah, mocking bird. It’s going to be epic. I can’t wait to tell Lars the good news, He is going to love Kim like I do.”
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I do not think that is right. He moved right on to Kim Khadashian right after he decided to divorce Francesca. I think it is pretty shallow. Look at all the men she was involved and separated from. James said he loved Francesca. Now he is saying he loves Kim Khadashian. He is moving up the social ladder. I did not think James was like that. Last year, James said he did not even like the Khadashians.
I believe this is a JOKE!! Read the last paragraph..Kim has no music background OR TALENT & there is no way in hell James would “work on the next Metallica album” with that bimbo!! I started LMAO!!!
ITS SATIRE LAD
I know it’s supposed to be satire but y’all should be ashamed of yourselves making tasteless jokes about a man who is probably already miserable over the end of his marriage. Thumbs down.
I think Kim is bring some fresh ideas to the new Metallica album. Can’t wait ti hear the new tunes!
@stayfreshrimsandcalipers
UMM.. John Lennon Said same things about Yoko ono,and Then Beatles split Up! MODERN Day John Lennon and Ims sure Modern Beatles BreakUp!! I A HUGE METALLICA FAN Since 81 . I Seriouly thought This Was A JOKE. And i dont think LARS ,Kirk and Robert dont want Kim touring with them with HER IDEAS!! METALLICA goes POP (POP Music and Pop no more Metallica. Lmao)