Madonna Beats & Keeps Intruder as Sex Slave, Feeding Him Only Viagra

A burglar picked the wrong mansion and the wrong Queen of Pop to mess with. Nigel Bellows broke into Madonna’s house and ended up as the victim when the singer overpowered him, tied him up naked and then used him as a sex slave for three days.

Bellows, 32, admitted to police that he had gone to the mansion with the intention of robbing it. The tables were turned quite dramatically when he was overcome by none other than Madonna herself. The Singer and icon is a third degree black belt in Shotokan Karate. She also stays in tip top shape through boxing, yoga and crushing walnuts with her butt cheeks.

Solar Plexus

Madonna floored the would-be burglar with a donkey kick to the solar plexus and a punch to the throat. Authorities say that Madonna then dragged the dazed and confused Bellows to a basement dungeon. She allegedly stripped him naked and, for the next three days, used him as a sex slave to ‘teach him a lesson’. All the while force feeding him Viagra to keep the lesson going.

Madonna Beats & Keeps Intruder as Sex Slave, Feeding Him Only Viagra

When not in use, Madge dressed the man in a leather bondage ‘Gimp’ suit and chained him up in a crate. She explained that she got the idea from Quentin Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction movie. “I love that movie” said Madonna. “Especially that scene, I used to lock Sean Penn in the crate all the time. He loved it.”

Bellows was eventually released after he vowed that he learned his lesson. Madonna gave the man a cheese sandwich, sausages, cab fare and a copy of her “Madame X” CD as a parting gift. He went straight to the police and told them of his harrowing ordeal. He was quickly arrested and then released after being mocked and ridiculed mercilessly by both inmates and officers.

Bellows who was treated at hospital for cuts, bruises, dehydration, swelling and multiple STDs stated, “It was the hardest three days of my life. I think I might go back tonight.”