Fertility Clinic Admits Charles Manson Sperm Used to Impregnate Over 300 Women

Charles Manson Sperm scandal. The Hinman Fertility Center in Rancho Cucamonga, California, is in hot water after a shocking scandal was uncovered. There was a huge mix up and the sperm sample from serial killer Charles Manson was accidentally used to impregnate unsuspecting women.

Basically The fertility center is blaming a former employee for the mixup. Apparently the employee, Michael Anthony Telesca, mislabeled the vials. It was supposed to be labeled Abby Normal, Do Not Use. The Manson sperm was supposed to be destroyed but was instead used to fertilize 300 eggs.

Charles Manson Sperm Incident

Nine months later, the fertility center began to receive complaints. Ellen Guarante received some of the tainted Manson sperm and eventually gave birth to a baby boy, Claude. Baby Claude began acting erratically, playing in the knife drawer, watching CNN and biting other children.

Fertility Clinic Admits Charles Manson Sperm Used to Impregnate Over 300 Women

At this point A full investigation was launched and the error was uncovered. Telesca confessed to the egregious error. “We deeply regret this tiny mishap”, stated Hinman spokesman Vince Brisciano, “we offer a full refund to any parents who wish to return their child.”

“Post birth abortions are now legal in California” said Brisciano. “So disposing of these defected kids won’t be a problem at all. Eventually Parents can get a full refund with a $235 restocking fee. By the same token We have a lot of expenses you know.”

By all means All sperm recipients from California should be on the lookout, as it is possible the sperm went out to labs all over the state. Brisciano commented “What’s the worse that could happen? We will continue to monitor the situation. Parents should notify authorities immediately if their child starts pulling wings off bugs or starts torturing animals. Psychopathic tendencies usually start to manifest around age 13.”